I wish I could read people's mind

Friday started off pretty standard. Usual problems at work.....my boss didn't inform us of an event the evening before. Ended up the important pple asked where we were, why no one was present to take pictures and they mentioned they informed my boss personally. Me and my colleagues were like ????? Later during the day, my boss had a talk with my colleague behind closed door. Later on, I was told by my colleague not to ask her any questions if I need help or information but to go to my colleagues instead. Never ask my boss 'cos she is busy. What is the hell is that!! I really don't get it why she can't tell me things face-too-face but uses a send-the-messenger method. Sigh....si beh sianz......(hokkien phrase,a chinese dialect. usually to describe a sitaution whereby a person feels very frustrated or upset about)

As usual, I went for band practice and was late cos practice started at 7pm. I arrived about 715pm. For the past week or so, there was an Australian conductor who conducted the band for el camino real every practice. He is a friend of my conductor. After practice that night, cher and I went to Ice COld Beer for a drink. The Australian conductor commented that I played better for the el camino real solo during practice earlier. I was encourage by that comment but told them I was only covering for Jo as he couldn't make it for practice. My conductor said I should play. Hmm....not sure if I should ask Jo about this......

Anyway, earlier as we were walking to Ice Cold Beer through concourse, cher showed us the various new displays that the current Arts Fest committee put up through campus for the Arts Fest in school. The theme was called nonsense. So cher showed us this cubicle inside the guy's toilet that was decorated like a doorway to a house. There was a fence at the cubicle entrance and homely things that decorated the inside, including the toilet bowl. So cool and cute! haha.....then we went to the handicapped toilet next to 7-eleven that was done up in a retro theme, with neon disco lights dancing on the wall and retro music being played loudly. You can hear the music as you approached the toilet. So interesting! I miss those days in school....so glad to see my university being so vibrant and exciting as ever. This Arts Fest is really interesting. Our concert is the closing event so we have to put up a good show. Ed mentioned at band prac earlier that the concert will be recorded live and if it is good enough, we will use the recording to audtion for World Music Contest in 2009. So i might go to europe next year....:)

And so we chilled at Ice COld Beer. Me and cher catched up on gossips and on each other....had random chats with the Austratlian conductor. We stayed till 1 plus am...mel and sy actually bothered to come over after eating tau huay (soya beancurd dessert) so that they can share cab with me to go home.....so nice of them. cher had to go to the hospital as her grandma was sick....cher i hope your grandma is doing ok.

I watched Cloverfield yesterday. I enjoyed it, although the ending was abrupt. Besides the much talked about Monster, the whole story also revolved around love and friendship, what people are willing to do for each other during times of crisis to save their love ones. The ending part was really touching but I shall not give away too much here. Go watch it..:)

ZZ and I were supposed to meet jy and gang for supper but it was cancelled in the end. So the two of us just hanged around town, had a chat in macdonalds. ZZ works in a relic temple organization and she was telling me some things about buddhism. Many people often go to the temple to pray for something and hope the deities will fufil their wish. But it doesn't work this way. Its quite difficult to explain here but zz was telling me when we go to a temple to offer our prayers, to wish for something, its more of a search, a process to find the answers yourself.Be at peace with yourself....something like that. It was quite "cheem" (Hokkien word, meaning something is quite profound or too difficult to understand) to me but after several explanations from zz, I kind of understand what she meant.

"To survive in this world, we hold close to us those

people on whom we depend. We trust in them our

hopes, our fears. But what happens

when trust is lost? Where do we run when

things we believe in vanish before our eyes?

When all seems lost,

the future unknowable,

our very existence in peril.......

all we can do is run."

Closing excerpts from Heroes season 1, Chapter 15 Run

Lately I have been feeling kind of lost, like I don't know what I want. My new job is not going that well for me. Band and work is stressful these days....Am I thinking too much? Its time to stop running and face the problem. I want to be happy. I want to do something that I really like. How do you choose between happiness and money?

Just got an sms from cher that her grandma is not doing well.......be strong girl.

Going to cook instant noodles for dinner again....

12 days to Ay Caramba....

20 Jan 2008 7.18pm