losing time....

I had some wierd flashbacks this morning when I woke up. I remembered the science lab in my secondary school where I did my chemistry and physics practical lessons, the funny incidents that happened there, the wooden stools and tables. I remembered the bus stop at my business block in sp where I will wait for the bus and also a meeting point with my friends. Strange....been remembering things from the past lately....

Its the long weekend but I didn't get to enjoy much of it as my dept had an event at raffles city. My colleague and I took turns to help out at the booth. It was tiring and I have another major event coming up on wed. I'm just looking forward to the event being over soon. I guess the good thing about my job is that I can get to know a lot of people and talk to them, like I was talking to this guy from this picturetaking company which we engaged for the event. And it was interesting to listen to his take on relationships and office politics.

Thursday, I left office quite late and was late for a dinner with suz, yh, yx and rh. Been a long long time since I last saw rh and it was nice to see him again. I bought suz a birthday cake and we celebrated her birthday a day early. I was feeling bad that I couldn't be more involved in celebrating her birthday. Her friends planned a surprise for her yesterday and asked me to join them. But as I was working yesterday, I was unable to be there for her. Sorry babe..but I'm glad to hear that your birthday weekend has been great...with an additional surprise! :) I wonder whether this new job of mine has been draining my energy. I seem to have less time for band and friends. I really need to keep up my playing.


wishing and hoping......*winks*
27 Oct 2008 10:02pm

Difficult Times

Is there such a thing as a good death? Maybe there is but I am not sure because we don't know what happens after death. Is there such a thing as afterlife? Chinese beliefs say there is but I'm skeptical about that. I'm just reacting to an article that I read by Sumiko Tan in today's newspaper. Yes we all will die one day. Its just a matter of whether the process will be a peacful or painful one. When I read how Sumiko's father died, I started thinking how I will react when such a day arrives. My dad is old and is suffering from several ailments. He often laments how he is leaving us soon and that just annoys me. Because I hate it when he says that. He is a good dad but just like any parent, they get on your nerves sometimes but deep down, you still love them. I don't look forward to it but I know I have to prepare myself for the day when my love ones will pass on. I remember attending the funeral of my girlfriend's mum a few years ago and I felt so sad for her. She seem to be accepting it when I saw her at the funeral but I couldn't help feeling the pain. I imagine how I would feel at my own parent's funeral. Sumiko mentioned in her article that there are four things to ensure a "good death". A good state of health which will minimize your sufferings, existence of family and friends who will care and support you, money to get you the care and comfort that you need in your remaining days and religion to make you feel better. I feel that the second factor is the most important of all as I think it could alleviate a lot of pain caused by the process of dying. I can't do much about my dad's health now but I guess I can help to make him feel better. But I'm just afriad his negativity will make me try less harder. Well, we won't know what wil happen in the future.....

After practice on friday, I hanged out with my sym gang at ice cold beer. It was a fun night as we played drinking games and ate lots (I like the part where we have to take out the little green man from the glass before we drink and putting him back into the glass). C was with us and I know he is still trying to get over his breakup. He drank too much and got drunk. Seeing how upset he is made me recalled my pain. No worries I am fine already. Just that I wonder how I could make him feel better. I told him to try and get his ex back if he really loves her and if she is adament in not starting over again, then he should move on. I hope you will overcome this period, C. You much be strong.

Yesterday met up with Ljun and we watched Burn After Reading. It quite a funny movie, a little lame and maybe not enough weight on the stroyline but I enjoyed it. It also gave an insight on how people will go to great lengths to attain good looks so as to find a life partner. It doesn't work this way. I don't deny looks matter somewhat when it comes to finding a partner but a lot also depends on the chemistry you have with the person. I will never resort to plastic surgery to look good, like what Frances McDormand's character does in the movie. I exercise to stay in good shape and to be healthy. Exercising will actually do a lot to boost your confidence, reduce stress and keeps one looking young.

Bad financial times now. Got to save and spend less....holding on....holding on.....

8:19pm 19 Oct 2008

So what do you want me to do?

I'm just sick of everything. I want a new life. So what if people thinks I am unfilial, irresponsible or simply don't care? They don't understand or know me at all. They don't know what is happening in my life. It doesn't mean that I don't do or say anything, it shows that I don't care. There is only so much that I can do and I have tried all that I can. If you don't help yourself, what can I do other than watching you go away?

15 Oct 2008 11:06pm

Try harder....

I have been catching the 3rd season of Heroes and the storyline so far is intriguing and thought-provoking. The latest episode showed how selfishness and greed could lead to destruction of a person and to the world. With the downturn of the financial sector and the world economy, I would say it could be caused by these two evils. We see these evils at work in our everyday lives.

Its been tiring and hective at work. I forgot to settle some tasks at the office on friday. Guess I am going to get it from ym manager tomorrow...sigh....two more events for tomorrow and tuesday. I really need a good rest.

sym performed at esplanade today. Its our first performance at the grandest arts venue in singapore and sadly, it didn't turn out as good as we wanted it to be. Due to a lack of time and preparation, we didn't play that well. I hope this serves as a wake up call to everyone, that the progress of this band relies on every single person's effort and commtment. I must say I did not put in my all for this performance and had tried hard with my busy work schedule but I wonder whether I have done enough? During the midst of this performance, a friend of mine told me his gf left him and he was devastated. It reminded me of my breakup last year and as a friend, I did what I could by relating what I learnt from the experience. Be strong my friend...only time can heal all wounds.

I dread tomorrow.....
12 Oct 2008 10:58pm

A Fairytale Wedding

It was a lovely wedding.

My galfriend cin got married on sunday and sdra, emi and I were her bridesmaids, together with a few of her other good friends. I really took my hat off her and her husband for planning such a detailed wedding with unique touches that I didn't or seldom see at other weddings.

The morning gatecrash action by the groom's party was the hilarious one. The groom actually barged in through the window in the bedroom next to the living room! And we didn't get our full red packet amount! The groommen were also a bunch of crazy and funny people. But what touched me in the entire wedding was the MTV they made using scenes from their outdoor photo taking session for the wedding photo album/gallery (oh, you should see how they do up their reception area! Instead of a photo montage, they displayed their wedding photos in a gallery setting. Viewing the pictures on frames and boards and nicely decorated. There were also well-wishes trees and an express photo-taking area for guest to take their picture and get it printed on the spot). It was sweet and loving and cin was so beautiful. The scenes showed how much they care and love each other. Earlier, as emi and I were sitting at the reception counter, I was telling her that seeing everyone around me getting married and attached made me feel a bit dejected about myself...but she said I should enjoy my singlehood and the special someone might not be far away.

But what really made me glad was that the four of us still care and keep in touch with each other after all these years. Cin's wedding brought us all back together again and the feeling was pure nostalgia. Real friends are those who pulled through with you after many years of changes and chapters in your life.

Hectic week ahead.....

11:45pm 7 Oct 2008